cracks.

how did i end up at this place? this unfamiliar place in which an infatuation with an ideology grew into pain, because my unwarranted request went unanswered. how did i, miss untouchable herself, let go? i have obviously lowered my standards...for wat? to blend in? why? i was born to stand out. why have i let this happen, but better yet, how do i recover? this veil is wearing thin...i cannot continue to portray this created character...the facade must subside. the pain swelling within me with each day causes me to slip further away from myself. willing to accept anything...settling, rather than rising...making egotistical remarks and phrases to hide the pain that lies within, hoping, pleading silently for a plan "B" to end the tears...but the waterfall cannot be contained with an invisible dam anymore. the cracks in the foundation are evident, only to me, but nevertheless apparent.